Science Desk Editor
Peer-reviewed research, misrepresented studies, and press releases written by PR firms
Harold has a PhD in biochemistry and the permanent expression of someone who just read a poorly summarized study on Twitter. He joined journalism to correct the record and has since learned the record is not interested in correction. His desk drawer contains forty-seven rejected corrections to other publications' science coverage, which he reads aloud when morale is low.
A Seattle man finds his wellness discount suspended after his sleep tracker flagged his recurring falling dreams as 'inefficient resource allocation.'
A landmark multinational study has officially confirmed that stepping directly into a puddle results in statistically significant sock dampness.
The American Psychiatric Guild has patented the late-summer feeling of mild regret, restricting its therapeutic treatment to a six-week commercial window.
A new study reveals a widespread domestic misunderstanding of thermodynamics, with millions convinced that ambient temperature is piped in from Maryland.
The University of Southern Ohio’s board of trustees voted unanimously to dedicate a massive portion of its endowment to a virtual nanotechnology facility.
A multi-year study by the National Institutes of Health has formally identified the neurological state of staring blankly at a wall while damp.
The National Science Foundation has renewed a major grant for the Hadal Void Project after the expedition successfully documented a total lack of biological…
A five-year federal study has successfully isolated the therapeutic benefits of flipping a pillow over to access the cooler, unused side.
AeroEuropa's new loyalty program rewards passengers for 'Inertia Minutes' accumulated during delays, turning operational failures into customer rewards.
Sanitation services in West Millbrook remain suspended as a municipal committee struggles to classify a hybrid packaging material that defies the state's…
Paris's public bike-share agency is facing severe supply shortages after placing Napoleon Bonaparte in charge of its morning redistribution logistics.
Parks Victoria has introduced a micro-reservation system for a single boulder, utilizing pressure sensors and LED countdowns to manage trail congestion.
A rigid federal procurement algorithm has forced the cancellation of the Aethelgard-7 mission to Jupiter after a minor stationery budget overdraft locked the…
A Gloucestershire town council has passed a regulation requiring property owners to purchase easements for any sounds that bounce off neighboring walls.
A temporal physicist from the late 21st century has cut his historical observation mission short after encountering a frustratingly familiar packaging defect.
A new atmospheric study reveals that a vast majority of Americans view the daytime moon as an administrative lapse rather than a natural orbit.
A Swiss municipal council has halted administrative operations and canceled trash collection to address a moral crisis caused by a sorting error.
The National Weather Service reports that a 200-mile-wide atmospheric system over Michigan has entered a phase of non-communicative, passive-aggressive…
Excavations in central Turkey have revealed the ruins of a 4,000-year-old city-state where social status and religion revolved around stabilizing uneven…
Researchers have successfully mapped the thermal properties of leaving a single leg outside the blankets, naming the childhood habit 'Unilateral Appendicular…