Morning Edition
9 stories filed this edition. The datelines are specific; the premises are negotiable.
Officials strip top runners of titles after post-race audit reveals widespread use of unauthorized magnetic bib fasteners.
A 46-year-old hobbyist runner was awarded first place at the Great Lakes Marathon after hundreds of elite athletes failed to use the sponsor's official safety…
Continue reading →The Munich Public Library’s new tactical reclamation division has executed its first suburban canvass to locate a paperback travel guide 14 days overdue.
A Naperville homeowner's $18,400 water damage claim was denied under an active 1847 charter clause requiring a night-watchman to patrol the kitchen hourly.
Denver transit voice Helen Vance has signed with a major talent agency to embark on a multi-city tour performing live readings of commuter delay announcements.
A standard two-cup Pyrex measuring cup has sold for $2.4 million at auction after a clerical error listed the kitchen item as high art.
A lifestyle influencer has been invited to address a major semiconductor conference after her skincare tutorial accidentally detailed a microchip cooling…
A multi-million dollar ethnographic study has revealed that 99.7% of households use the bottom oven drawer as a storage bin for nested cookie sheets.
A luxury apartment complex in North Carolina has installed an advanced surveillance network designed to monitor and fine tenants for minor aesthetic lease…
Industry analysts and morning talk shows offer frame-by-frame breakdowns of Julian Vance parking a standard station wagon in Manhattan without assistance.